Listening to God

Amy and I have been praying a lot recently because we have some big decisions to make in our lives and I have found that I have a hard time listening to answers from God. I often pray for his guidance and then I find myself trying to take action based on what I think is best. So I have been trying to pray and then spend some quiet time just listening or at least making myself ready to listen if he decides to answer audibly or inaudibly right then. This is really hard for me to do, I am very impatient and I have a very active imagination so it is really difficult for me to sit there and not have my mind wander. I think I also stress myself out looking for answers in places and people. I will start over interpretting events or things people say in an effort to find an answer from God about what I'm dealing with. It's a frustrating situation because the things we are praying out really will have a strong bearing on the rest of our lives. I really do want God to lead us in what pursuits we should undertake but I have a hard time giving up control and just letting him do his thing. So I'm trying to practice being patient and I am trying to have faith that I will know beyond any doubt when God is speaking me and showing us the way he would like us to go.

For those of you that pray do you find that you have a hard time receiving God's answers? Sometimes I think I might pray and not expect an answer at all, like I'm doing it just to try and be courteous to God but ultimately I am going to decide on my own anyway. I'm trying to break this habit. I have this belief that if I really can let God direct my life and use me in a way that best suits me then those deep desires of mine that are often hard to verbalize would come to be. I think I would feel comfortable, confident, joyful, and proud. We'll see if I can ever get there.