Salespeople

This post is fueled by a salesman who over the past two weeks called me at least 5 times. I finally called this guy back today and rather than tell him off about how obnoxious he is I politely just told him that we wouldn't be interested in the near future in using his services but that I will keep him in mind if we change our mind. Reflecting on this situation I am angry for two reasons. First, why in the world does this guy think that calling me practically every day is going to make me happy and want to buy things from him? Salespeople across pretty much all industries are not well liked simply because all they seem to do is badger us until we buy from them. It seems like it used to just be car salesmen and people that go door to door were the ones that everyone hated but we could tolerate it because we really didn't buy cars that often and we could always just not answer the door. But now the problem has become much more wide spread; cell phone people, newspaper, cable tv, telephone service, checkout clerks at most retail outlets, auto repair people, fast food people... etc. Everyone wants to sell us more!!!! Having been a salesman I know why this is the case. Salespeople make money on sales, the quicker they make sales the quicker they make money. Their training frequently becomes the more people you try to sell to the more sales you'll make. They care nothing about each individual person that they interact with, and they care nothing for whether or not the product or service being sold is even useful to the customer. All of their focus is on whether or not they make a sale. Try walking into a sales environment and tell the first person who approaches you that you are absolutely not going to buy anything that day and see what happens. (When I am picking my car up from the service drive at the dealership I like to walk through all the new cars to see how many salesguys will approach me just so I can tell them I'm not here to buy and see their disgusted reaction, one guy was in the middle of a cell phone conversation while he asked me if I needed any help, he wouldn't even get off the phone!).

Now, the reason salespeople are like this is the second reason I am angry about my situation I mentioned. Rather than tell the salesman that I am very annoyed by his approach and that I really don't appreciate being called repeatedly by a person I don't know and that I am so dissappointed in his attempt to get me as a customer I have no intention of ever using him or his company, I simply said I'm not interested. I gave him no feedback to use for how he sells to people except that maybe he needs to be more aggressive to get me to buy! We as consumers need to dictate how the sales process should work. The only reason salespeople treat us the way they do is because it is effective. If we didn't tolerate it they would have no choice but to start treating us better. Here is my advice to the world (though it may not go beyond my small handful of readers) In any sales situation in which you are going to buy something, go into it with the resolve that you are going to be treated with respect and friendliness, you will not be sold anything you don't need, you will not pay for any extras beyond what you intended to purchase, you will not be made to feel guilty or pressured to make a decision on the spot, you will not pay a price you are not completely comfortable with, and any salesperson who makes any of these things happen will not be getting your business and neither will the store that salesperson works for. This will be tough and uncomfortable but if we don't start now this sales situation may never change for hundreds of years!! Think of your children, grandchildren and their children and the sales experiences they will have, save them from the agony I beg you!

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Investing in Relationships

Amy and I were at our church's "Marriage Getaway" this past weekend down in Irvine. We had a really good time hanging out and meeting new people, but beyond that the things that were talked about by our pastor throughout the weekend were really valuable so I'd like to pass some of it along.

Matt (our pastor) was talking about how we need to basically be more involved with our spouse and by doing so we can increase our intimacy and inloveness. He talked about how common it is for a husband and wife to have interests and hobbies that are their own and they really don't share with their spouse usually because the spouse isn't interested. He urged us to think differently about the things our spouse likes. We should acknowledge that there is obviously something about those things that makes our spouse enjoy them, which means there is something worth liking about it. Our love for our spouse should motivate us to give more consideration to those things and by doing so it is likely that we too will find something we like about it. All this is to say that the more we write off our spouses hobbies or interests as only for them, the more we are creating distance in the marriage.

I feel like even if I am pretty certain that I won't really like something Amy likes, I should still be open to trying it simply because she likes it. This can be anything... Food, activities, people, movies or shows, music. The more we can share the closer we will be.

To a little bit lesser degree I think this lesson can be applied to friendships, for those that are looking to build stronger, closer friendships, this might be a good approach.

Just something to think about if you haven't before.